I can’t believe it’s been 19 years since Kurt’s untimely death. He was found dead on April 8, 1994 in his Seattle home. He died three days prior and was found with a shotgun across his chest and a suicide note in another part of the house. The news of his death shocked the world and the loss was felt immediately. The world lost a music icon and the voice of a generation was gone. There have been and continue to be many theories surrounding his death. Theories include the possibility of Kurt being murdered. I’m not about to get into any of those because frankly they’re irrelevant and I don’t care to. The point is, he is gone and the loss of what was and what could have been has never fully gone away.
I was very young when Cobain died. In April of 1994 I was merely 6 years old, but I knew then something was terribly wrong. I remember the day his body was discovered. I was at my grandmothers house and my older cousin was watching MTV like she always did. A “Breaking News” graphic flashes across the screen and Kurt Loder delivers the devastating news. I didn’t fully understand what had happened until years later when I was old enough to appreciate good music. It wasn’t until my early teens that I really started to discover Nirvana and become a fan of rock music. So I guess you could say that Nirvana was a bit before my day in a way. I was blown away the first time I heard Bleach and Nevermind, a feeling felt by millions during Nirvana’s reign. Only other bands that have given me that feeling of “Holy S–t” have been the Beatles and the Sex Pistols when I first listened to them.
I truly feel that Nirvana’s music, much like the Beatles, is timeless. I often see kids not older than 15 walking around in Nirvana shirts and blasting “Smells Like Teen Spirit”. These are kids that were years from even being conceived when Kurt died. It makes me truly happy when I see that because it means that the younger generations are still getting that “Holy S–t” feeling and discovering great music for themselves. In this day of autotune and polished and produced pop stars, kids are still making their way to the real deal. That’s the way it was for me to growing up. My brother first introduced me to rock n roll, he gave me my first album (Californication) and that was it; I was bitten. I couldn’t get enough of it and I wanted to hear all I could. I remember sitting in my room for hours listening to music and playing along with my bass. I’ve come a long way since then in my knowledge of music and skills on the bass and guitar, but I still do that. Some things don’t change and I’m glad one of the things that hasn’t changed is the fact that kids are making great music an important part of their lives and discovering their own paths.
There is no way to know what could have been if Kurt was still around. The last few years of his life were riddled with drugs, anger and depression. He was not happy with much at all and unfortunately he left so much behind. A wife, a baby girl, a band and millions of fans around the world that needed his music. Kurt may be dead, but he will live on in Nirvana’s recordings. He will always be missed.
