Why hold a grudge? If someone has made you mad, but has sincerely apologized to you, why hate them?
I’m the type of person who would hold a grudge for years and not speak to someone who upset me. My life has been spinning in circles for the last 5 to 6 years, and what I’ve learned is it is better to forgive them, because if they were your friend they should be allowed the second chance.
My best friend from junior high and I have been in too many fights to count. The worst probably was after we graduated from high school. Each time was about a BOY! Seriously, a boy? Back then I thought it was wrong to be the type of person to mess with a boys head and now I just think I was being petty and may have overreacted by not talking to my friend for 5 years. One day, about a year ago, my friend apologized and I forgave her for everything. We started to hang out again and well, I got myself into the worst petty fight that lasted 3 months. Today I had the courage to tell her I was sorry and I missed her. Every day I thought “this would be so much fun with her. Why don’t I text her?” The reason I can’t was because I wasn’t talking to her.
So many times I say “I’m never going to talk to that person ever again” but I’ve finally come to the realization that I need them in my life. I forgive them and bring them back to my world because I need them as much they need me.
My biggest problem is pushing people away for horrible reasons. This problem dates back to junior high, or maybe even earlier. I believe everyone should have a second chance no matter how much they hurt me. I’ve lost a lot and gained more with the strength I gained from the amount of fighting I have had in my life. It builds up to forgiveness, and the sense of trusting that person again.
This year everyone has resolutions. I’m going to call 2014 the year of forgiveness. I have decided that I will forgive or apologize to the ones I have been hurt by or have hurt. You can only be who you want to be, and the anger you had by someone you had at one time shouldn’t define that.
So when you feel the courage to say I forgive you to the ones that gave you that change in yourself, I say don’t stop yourself. Don’t be afraid to say what’s on your mind to that person.
No ones perfect, not even you. The only person that can change you, is you. It is better to forgive and forget than to hold a petty grudge against someone for years at a time. Who wants to deal with the stress of possibly seeing that person at the supermarket and having your heart go to your stomach?
A co-worker of mine that I have recently became close friends with gave me the inspiration to forgive a friend that had made me furious. She sat down and said “you are the most honest person and you always let people know how it is.” My co-worker made me realize that if I am going to be honest, I need to forgive my friend and stop sweating the small things in life.
What I am trying to say is, give your ex-friendships another try because they may have changed since you fought with them. Don’t judge the book by its cover until you read it completely. You never know you might like that book until the end. Today is the day to live, forgive and let go. You only live the life you live once. Sometimes you need to take the risk to forgive an old friend. After reading this try to take a deep breathe and think of how you can fix the problem don’t wait for the problem to fix itself.
